Thursday, April 19, 2012

$4.2 million settlement for student paralyzed by bully


By Miranda Leitsinger, msnbc.com
When Sawyer Rosenstein was 12, a punch from a bully changed his life forever, leaving him paralyzed, and at times, near death from the complications of his condition.


Now, six years after the assault, the New Jersey school board in the district where he was a student has agreed to a $4.2 million settlement.

“It feels really great to finally have just a sense of closure … that this really difficult part of my life is behind me,” Rosenstein, an 18-year-old freshman majoring in communication at Syracuse University, told msnbc.com. “I can actually focus on all of the successful things that I am doing now and all of the successful plans that I have for my future.”
The Rosenstein’s lawyer, Jeffrey Youngman, said the settlement was “absolutely unique.”
“I see stories virtually, if not daily, every other day on bullying and … it’s one of the first stories where there actually was a result that’s positive and truly helps the family,” he told msnbc.com, noting that the Ramsey Board of Education does not admit liability.
“But the facts surrounding this case are unbelievable, I mean they’re dramatic in that you have a child who actually was pro-active” about dealing with the bullying, he said.
Youngman was referring to emails written by Rosenstein to officials at Eric Smith Middle School – a guidance counselor, an assistant principal – about the harassment.
"I would like to let you know that the bullying has increased," he wrote to his guidance counselor three months before the assault that left him paralyzed, in an email that was reported by The Record. "I would like to figure out some coping mechanisms to deal with these situations, and I would just like to put this on file so if something happens again, we can show that there was past bullying situations."
On May 16, 2006, a bully punched Rosenstein so hard that he fell to his knees. Two days later, he screamed out at home.
“We picked him up and called an ambulance,” his father told the newspaper. "He hasn't walked since."
Rosenstein was paralyzed from the waist down due to a clot that had formed after the blow in a major artery above his abdomen. When the clot moved down to his spine, it burst, leaving him paralyzed. Complications resulting from his paralysis, such as scoliosis, led to 19 surgeries and a complete spinal fusion. He almost died several times, Youngman said.

Rosenstein said he turned the corner during one of those hard days thinking “why me” after one of the many surgeries in which he considered his options.
“For me, I saw it as a challenge to say, ‘Okay, in your face, society. I’m going to take this and I’m going to hand it right back at you. You give me lemons, I’m going to throw a lemon tree in your face,'” he said.
He missed a year of school but still graduated on time and made the honor roll every semester, Youngman said.
“The way that he carries himself is just amazing, he's an inspiration,” he said.
In 2009, The Rosensteins filed their lawsuit against the school board, various administrators, other individuals and the boy who punched Sawyer; the settlement was agreed to at the end of March. Part of the family’s case included claims that school officials knew or should have known that Sawyer’s attacker had violent tendencies, Youngman said, citing prior punching incidents with others. The family settled with that student two years ago. The terms are confidential.
“What the school was doing was just indicative of what the schools do in these instances: they just have policies and don’t know how to enforce them,” Youngman said. “You can have a written policy all you want, but if it is not put into effect and it's not enforced effectively, you’ve got a policy in name only.”
In a statement, the Ramsey Board of Education said that after three years of depositions and pre-trial discovery, its insurance carriers agreed to the settlement.
“There has been no admission by the Board or by any of its employees of a violation of any law or duty owed to the Plaintiffs,” the statement said.
The board denied allegations that it or its employees had “failed or compromised its responsibility to develop and to implement effective policies and procedures to protect the safety and rights” of the school community, the statement continued, noting that the district "prides itself for the role which it has played in recognizing and developing an awareness of the dangers of bullying, intimidation and harassment in the school setting." 

Rosenstein at the Intrepid Sea, Air, and Space Museum where he met the crew of the final space shuttle mission, STS-135.
Sawyer Rosenstein only recently shared his story publicly after much long discussion with his family, deciding to do so to raise awareness. Otherwise, he doesn’t like telling his story.
“I don’t want it to be ‘woe is me’ and sympathy. I want it to be more of a story of success, that even with all this, I was still able to prevail,” he said. “I want people to root me on in whatever I’m doing and help me through it.”
He encouraged anyone suffering from bullying to document it as he had, believing it was a key factor in making his case. Though he was constantly bullied and remembered how much he wanted it to stop, he wanted others to know that it does end.
Today, Rosenstein, who wants to be a news reporter, hosts and edits a podcast he helped to co-found called Talking Space. He said he attended the final space shuttle launch as the youngest ever accredited reporter at 17.
What he hopes that people will get out of his story is that they understand “this is an issue, this is something that needs to be taken care of, and this kid has taken something terrible and made something great out of it. I can do the same.”

Tuesday, April 17, 2012

What You Say

Afraid to be a witness?  Afraid to tell your story?  Don't be.  You never know who you might touch.
Just recently I preached at a friends church and she asked me to make my sermon relevant to bullying.  I used several examples of my own, plus found many examples from the Bible.  
The result:  A man who was never able to even begin to come to terms with what had happened to him as a child is now ready to face his demons.  What an awesome tribute.  
You never know who needs to hear your message.  Don't be afraid to speak up.  You might just be the person someone needs to hear that day.

Friday, March 16, 2012

What Would You Do?

The popular show on ABC that acts out different scenarios in public places to see if anyone will react and step in.  Tonight the show is about bullying.
The scene:  a young man who happens to be an albino is sitting on a street bench when two other young men come up and start harassing him.  Out of the 200 people who passed by that day only 14 stopped to help.  Fourteen!!  Why?  Why aren't more people willing to stand up for someone being bullied?
The scenario was changed up a bit to include a girlfriend sitting with the young man on the bench.  And still most people walked on by.
But of the 14 who stopped to intervene, I applaud you!  These people were not afraid to say something, to stop the bullying.  They knew it wasn't right and they were strong enough to say so.  They did what we all should do in this case, stand up for what you believe in.  Treat others like you would want to be treated, in this case, help this person who is being bullied just like you would want someone to help you if you were the one sitting on the bench.  Often times it only takes one person to step in and then others find their strength to step in too.
The actor playing the young man on the bench was brought to tears at the compassion of those who helped him.  He said that this scenario happens to him often but usually no one is strong enough to step in and say anything.
All I can say is put yourself in his shoes.  Think about how it would make you feel to be bullied and watch others just walk on by, willing to let it continue happening.  Isn't that what happened with Jesus when he went before the Sanhedrin?  I have to imagine that there was at least one person in that room who disagreed with what was happening.  Unfortunately that one person did not stand up for what he knew was wrong.
Which person do you want to be?  Are you willing to let fear lead you?  Are you willing to walk on by and see the behavior as acceptable?  Can you justify ignoring the situation?  Are you always going to be willing to let others lead the way even if you disagree?
Stand up, be counted, be willing to say "this is wrong."  Don't walk on by.

Want to watch the episode with host John Quinones, click here:  http://abcnews.go.com/blogs/entertainment/2012/03/man-with-albinism-bullied-on-street-would-you-step-in/

Tuesday, February 28, 2012

Ohio School Shooting

In thinking about and praying for all those affected by this horrible tragedy, I am wondering why there are always conflicting reports.  As usual there are the similar reports that the shooter was an outcast, dressed in goth style, and didn't have many friends.
The conflict that is present, which I seem to notice happens often when things like this happen, is that some are saying he was bullied and others are saying he was never bullied.  I saw the same thing happening with Ruth Ann Payton, the 12 year old girl who killed herself two weeks ago.
Are others just not willing to admit there was bullying?  Are they afraid of being bullied themselves if they speak up?  Or do they just not want to get involved?
The school here in Chetek where Payton attended says they have things in place to prevent and report bullying.  But as teachers and counselors were meeting with the kids after Payton's death no one was saying anything about bullying, therefore making the school feel that bullying was not an issue.  I really don't like to accuse or suggest that the school officials were not telling the truth, but we all know that bullying goes on everywhere.  What I don't understand is why reports coming from outside the perimeter of the school grounds say bullying was definitely a part of this girls decision to end her life at such a young age.
My heart goes out to the families in Ohio who are having to deal with children who were injured yesterday, it goes out to everyone having to understand their feelings and fears.  It especially goes out to the family who lost a child.  No parent should have to suffer that.  And my heart goes out to the family of the shooter and him.  Obviously this boy, this child, was hurting in some way to make him feel the need to hurt and kill other kids.  I cannot pretend to know or understand why.  But it breaks my heart.
What are your thoughts on this tragedy?  What are your thoughts on why kids don't want to admit that bullying is occurring?  Are we as parents and educators, pastors dropping the ball somewhere?  Are we causing them to fear telling us these things or admitting these things?  I just want to understand.